Series 1, Episode ??
Air Date October 13th 2001
December 20th 2003 (SM:tv Gold Repeat)
Written By I. Blower
Celebrity Guest(s) Ricky Tomlinson (as Greengas); Patsy Kensit (as Doctor Rumble)
Previous You are at the first episode
Next Unknown
Next known: Poaching
Forensics is an episode of Heartbeat parody and popular sketch, Fartbeat. It was 'written' by I. Rumble and first aired on October 13th 2001. It was repeated on December 20th 2003, as part of SM:tv Gold.


SM TV Gold- Fartbeat

SM TV Gold- Fartbeat


Screen Shot 2012-08-20 at 18.45.47

The sargent struggles to keep his hat on after breaking wind

The scene begins as the sergeant (Ant) is on the phone, telling a woman on the other end to stop panicking as the strange noise she had just heard was, in fact, PC Blower (Dec) arriving at her home. He ends the call as WPC Misgassed (Cat) walks in, asking her superior what she should do with "t' prisioner." The sergeant dismisses her question, instead asking her to explain why there is an outline of the dead body on the floor. He becomes angry with his lack of "solid evidence" as we see Blower enter the room, guiding prisioner Greengass (Ricky Tomlinson). Blower notices the marks on the floor and suggests they call in a forensics team, with Misgassed quick to suggest Doctor Rumble (Patsy Kensit). She soon arrives and inspects the shape, only to reveal that it is, in fact, a map of the Isle of Man. The scene then ends with Rumble stating that the cloud-like shape, attached to the isle, is 'Turtles Head,' a natural beauty spot, which causes the group to arrupt with laughter.